(disclaimer: I am not a certified life coach, dietician, fitness instructor or personal trainer. I’m not telling you that this is the only way to do something, just my personal journey and how I went about it. You have to find what works for you. Also, I know every health journey is different & results will look different for each person. I know my worth is not found in my body.)
There is a certain number on the scale that when I see it, I say, Okay, Enough is enough. There is a certain feeling I get in my body, when I say Enough is ENOUGH. I’m not sure if it’s being an 8 on the Ennegram, but when I want to change something, I figure out what it’s going to take to make the change and I do it.
I’ll talk about this more later, but I have a VERY sensitive stomach. Is it possibly from the years of feeding my body processed sugar and garbage? My pop/soda addiction. That one week I lived off of pixie sticks, Red Bull and Monster? Who knows. But I know this, I had my gallbladder removed in 2014 and its been a crazy learning experience to figure out what will and will not send me STRAIGHT to the bathroom. (yeah I went there).
Flash forward to January 2020. I was so motivated by the NEW DECADE, but I kept telling myself that I need to breastfeed (pump) for a full year, and I still had 6 months to go. I was sooo worried about not consuming enough calories, I was afraid that workouts would affect my supply, believe me, I had a MILLION excuses. It only took 12 days into the new year for me to say “ENOUGH IS ENOUGH”.
Before I found out I was pregnant with Vivienne, I had just lost 20 lbs, I was in great shape and felt unstoppable! I was so proud of my progress in those short 3 months, that when that pregnancy test said positive, I was scared about what I knew was coming (the pregnancy/ not the baby). If you’ve been around for the past 6 years, you know that pregnancy KICKS. MY. BUTT. in those first 3 months, and I knew it meant I only had maybe a week left before I started feeling all the sickness. With all three pregnancies I was diagnosed with hyperemesis gravidarum, and lost 10-12 lbs from 6.5 weeks gestation-20 weeks.
Something no one tells you about after you have your third baby is the SERIOUS PHYSICAL TOLL that pregnancy and child birth can have on your body. Holy cow. Diastasis Recti. Weak Pelvic Floor. Pelvic organ Prolapse. (not to mention the toll that sleep deprivation can have on you) After Vivienne was born, I felt SO WEAK. And having her be my third baby, I wanted to soak in every drop of her, but also knew the importance of breastfeeding, so I made sure to keep my calories up by eating my body weight in Double Stuf Oreos, Peanut butter M&Ms & ice cream. “These all make me drink water” is how I justified it to myself.
Cut back to January 12th, I’ve just spent a week feeling like crap, constantly running to the bathroom because sweets do that to me. Everything I ate was making me sick. I was packing on weight like crazy, because most of what I was eating was refined sugars & carbs and my body was storing everything it could. I got on the scale and saw those numbers. I was at my “uncomfortable for me” weight. My clothes didn’t fit anymore, even wearing LEGGINGS was hurting my stomach. I lived in sweatpants and sweatshirts. I wanted to cry.
It was time. So. I grabbed my tape measure & workout journal, swallowed my pride, took some “Before” photos and recorded my measurements.
Don’t stop reading: because this is where it gets hard, because a lot of people will say “Don’t do that to yourself! Your worth is not made up by numbers and measurements” And I 100% Agree with that. These measurements and photos were not meant to shame me, or tell me I wasn’t valuable, but yet, acted as my motivation to see change. It’s easy to get discouraged if you’re basing your progress primarily on a scale, especially if you’re working out. Muscle weighs more than FAT. And I knew these numbers wouldn’t consume me.
How I took My Measurements:
Using a seamstress or fabric tape measure, make sure the tape is laying flat on the surface around each area, and do not pull super tight.
What I recorded:
Left Arm
Right Arm
Bust
Natural Waist
Belly (at the biggest area)
Hips
Left Thigh
Right Thigh
Left Calf
Right Calf
Why I recorded inches: It was amazing to see the inches drop, even if the pounds weren’t. I would take measurements every other week, sometimes I gained an inch, sometimes I lost 4 inches all around, but the process is the Journey.
My Before Photos from Jan 13, 2020
Next up, I took Before Pictures: One from the front, side & back. And here’s why, obviously you can see a physical change in a photo, but also, you will start to see a difference in posture and confidence. That is something you can’t see on a scale.
Now here’s the most important thing I want to communicate to you. There is no “END RESULT” no “desired pants size” or number on the scale. This was a conscious lifestyle change. I wanted to become someone who ENJOYED the workout. Someone who made fitness a part of her life, not someone who fit it in if I had the time, or because I wanted to punish my body for the choices I made. I actually started to CRAVE the endorphins. I’ve learned that I’m a better mom/wife if I am able to take 30-40 min a day to put in my headphones and do the work.
July 2020 Progress Photo.
Today marks 6 whole months. It started slow, with maybe 2-3 workouts a week. Some yoga & spin classes. Now it’s every day I do SOMETHING to move my body. Running, spinning, yoga, strength training.
I’ve lost 10 pounds. Down 30.5 total inches.
I’m going to be honest with you, if all this hard work was only about the pounds, I would have given up months ago. Also, If you’re reading this and saying, you don’t have the time… I’m here to say, you do. I have 3 kids. Put down your phone. That 30 min you could spend scrolling, could be your 30 min.
All that to say, don’t make it about self loathing or shame. Do it for you because you want to love the body you’ve been given. I have cellulite, stretch marks and lots of loose skin, but my body gave me three wonderful babies. I shifted my mindset away from “losing weight” and said Screw Being Skinny, I want to be STRONG. I want my kids to see that when you have something you want to fix, don’t just talk about it, go and do something.